I wouldn’t consider myself a risk-taker.
Sure, I’ve traveled to third-world countries without getting the appropriate shots and moved to Chicago without even visiting the city. (I am an Aries!)
But in general, I tend to live between the lines. I don’t paddle out if the waves are overhead and I wouldn’t walk my dogs in the middle of the night.
And to get me to go out on a date with someone I’ve never met before falls into that category.
Here’s what happened: Back in November 2013, I confessed to a friend that I was divorced. It wasn’t something I liked to broadcast. In fact, only a handful of people knew that my marriage was over.
I didn’t tell anyone for a variety of reasons, one of which was not wanting to get set up.
Which is exactly what happened.
My friend sent me over a link to the Facebook page of a guy he had known for a couple of years.
“Single,” he wrote.
“Who is he?”
“He’s a professor at UH, works with us on the wetland project, he does aquaculture mostly.”
“Nice?” I asked. Because that’s really, really important to me.
“Nice,” my friend responded. “And hunky.”
“I seriously don’t care about hunky.” (True.)
After a few back-and-forths — and then a serendipitous assignment on aquaculture — I decided I’d email this guy my friend was raving about.
My attitude was this: “If he’s nice and he’s active and he’s not an idiot or a misogynist or a downer or crazy or an asshole, I’m open.”
So I emailed him about the story. He wrote back the next morning, his message full of useful information. I appreciated his quick and comprehensive response. We became Facebook friends and, a month later, he emailed me this line about that story I was supposed to write: “I’m happy to help, too, and maybe we can meet up sometime in person to discuss.”
We agreed to meet on Dec. 14, 2013 in the early morning to surf at Queen’s — and to talk about aquaculture.
We surfed. And we did talk. But not just about aquaculture.
We wound up talking for six hours at Rainbow Drive-In. And before he got home, he texted me about surfing the next morning, too.
We saw each other every single day from that point on. And six months to the day we met, we were married.
And all it took was an email to a stranger.
I’ve looked back on my exchange with our mutual friend who set us up and I always laugh when I read the message he sent me, begging me not taking on this guy’s last name if we ever got married. (And this was before I had even sent that first email.) “Cat Fox,” he said, was just too much.
And yet, here we are, a year after we met on that fateful morning at the beach, and I’m officially — and legally and happily — a Fox.
Celebrating our one-year anniversary this weekend at the Moana Surfrider.
It’s still so unbelievable to me that our lives intersected last year, that we were both single at the same time, that we would both instantly like each other so much that in six months we made our relationship legal.
It just seems so surreal.
I barely knew the guy at first. (I won’t lie, I did Google him, but not much showed up.) And I’ve never really been the type to just meet someone like that — at 5 a.m. in Waikīkī, no less.
Yet, that departure from the way I usually operate proved to be the best decision of my life.
I met my husband, my best friend. I’m part of an awesome, supportive family. And my two dogs have another sister. Life couldn’t be better or more complete.
I’m still not going to paddle out in high-advisory surf or move to Syria. (There’s no good reason there.) But maybe, sometimes, every once in awhile, I might shake things up, do something that’s out of my ordinary.
Because you just never know what amazing turn your life might take.
Wonderful love story! Have a wonderful life together and a Merry Chistmas!!!
Aw, thanks! This will be our second Christmas together — but first one married. I guess I should think of some kind of tradition, huh? Yikes! *adding to the list*
Wow! What a love story! It could be made into a movie.
It would be a comedy! LOL
CAT: you never know what happens the second time around. Mele Kalikimaka and Hauoli Makahiki Hou to you and yours!
This is VERY true! I’m just happy he took a chance on me, too 🙂
Simply a beautiful story. Congratulations Cat!
Thank you! I do feel very lucky 🙂
Isn’t it funny how something changes the course of your life? You may not have been actively looking but something out there was. I think about how things could have been different in my own life if I decided to bypass the guy on the online relationship site. I wouldn’t be almost married for 10 years with 2 beautiful boys. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
No kidding! It’s interesting how taking one little chance can change your entire life! Happy you took that risk, too! I’m sure you think about that every time you see your boys! Happy Holidays!
Beautiful story, Cat! I’m tearing up, reading the lovely of how you met Mr. Fox and how he’s a great guy. Mr. Fox, this is my cousin so continue to be amazing to her!
Yes, my cousins always got my back!!! LOL! Merry Christmas to you and your fam, too!
Great story! Love the 5am surf meeting. So glad you finally found that special soul mate.
Thanks! I feel very lucky! And let me tell you, I wouldn’t just meet anyone at 5 a.m. in Waikiki! Lol!
Love this! I think the most amazing part of the story is that THERE WAS SOMEONE ON ISLAND YOU DIDN’T KNOW. LOL!
LOL! This is very, very true. Hahahahaha
Great story Cat! I wasn’t actively looking for my wife when she came into my life, but I’m glad she did. Sometimes it’s just FATE…
Yep, this is true. Sometimes we can’t force it. We just gotta let life do its thing!
what a great story , continued
happiness and good health
Been a long time reader of your blog, first time commenter. This was such a beautiful and heartwarming story. Made my heart smile. Thank you! 😉
Congratulations! As a grateful parent (of James) back when you were “Miss Cat” at Nuuanu Elementary, I am just sooooo delighted!
Nice story. It all lined up nicely, too. Would life be like if we never even took a measured risk?
Congratulations. So very happy for you, Cat! Hope to meet “Hunky” sometime soon.
What a great story! Congrats! You guys look so happy. It gives me hope 🙂
Beautiful love story! Wishing you guys many more chapters together!
I met my husband on a blind date. We had talked over the phone once or twice before meeting and I was smitten from the get-go 🙂 it’s been 12 years now since we grabbed a pint of Guinness together and it has been a great ride so far! Happy holidays to you, Kai and the pups!
You the bomb Cat . Love it!! Happy wife Happy for life:-)
That’s an awesome story. Thanks for sharing.
It’s so funny trying to piece together someone’s life by checking their IG feed. I knew something was up when that third dog showed up–and the mystery lasted for months!
Ok, now I want to hear his story about how you guys met!
Hi Cat…….great story!!! Thanks for sharing……it just warms my heart!!! Congratulations!!! We’re so happy for you both!!! xoxo, Sue
WOW, amazing story, nothing venture, nothing gain. You never know what will happen until you try. Happy Holiday.
Aw, thanks! Happy Holidays to you and your family, too!
So great to finally hear how this new life of yours all started! Glad to hear and see how happy Mr. Fox makes you.
Leap and the net will appear. It certainly does happen, and I’m pleased you both took that leap, even if it began as a small step toward story and surf.
Truly, Fox suits you. I knew an Angel once who married a Fox, and it suited her also, very well.
I was looking up a recipe for a crab pan sushi recipe and there was a link to you, so naturally I had to look. What an nice story to see :). You go girl! Hope to see you soon. We are grateful to have met you this year. Here’s to a happy, healthy and prosperous 2015!
(Cat Fox…so you..so cool 🙂
What an incredible story. I am SO happy for you!
Reassuring story. I’m in a totally different category but actually the same, sort of–widowed for three years and ready to enter society again. I recently had a brief acquaintanceship, I doubt if “relationship” is the exact word, with a woman whom I liked a lot but we were not compatible and squabbled, which took me by surprise. Aaargh. Liking someone you’re not compatible with is a special kind of torment. I talked with my 26-year-old granddaughter, who knows all :-), about it and I said at least I found out what my bottom line is–don’t yell at me! She told me there is value in finding out one’s bottom line. True dat.