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‘Rage against the dying of the light’

By Catherine Toth Fox • October 9, 2012 • Musings, The Daily Dish

The one thing that happens when you — like me — hang out with people 30 years older than you, they make references you can’t place.

They talk about the Piggly Wiggly in Kaimuki and Spanish rice in school lunches.

And they refer to poems and songs I’ve never read or heard.

Like “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night” by Dylan Thomas, a Welsh poet who died in 1953 — a full two decades before I was even born.

It was used in an announcement that one of our dear friends — Jim “Jimbo” Hudson — had lost his long battle with cancer. (I blogged about him back in 2009. He’s the third from the left in the first row.)

I say “long” because when he was first diagnosed three years ago in California, we weren’t sure what was going to happen. The cancer had spread throughout his body. He couldn’t swallow. He stopped eating. He had lost a lot of weight.

But over the past three years, he fought. He went through treatment like a champ. (He even managed to keep his well-coiffed hair!) He made a couple of trips back to Hawaii, where he loved to surf, and paddled out in Waikiki like nothing had changed. He was that same upbeat, smiling guy in the lineup — with the perfect head of hair — and it seemed like he had kicked the cancer to the curb.

But we all knew it would be an epic battle — and we all hoped for the best. Remission is always possible, right? That’s what we silently told ourselves.

But the cancer finally overtook him, and after months in hospice, he slipped away, paddled out to that proverbial surf break in the sky.

It reminds me of that scene in “Point Break” where Bodhi, played by Patrick Swayze, points at the massive swell and says, “Look at it! It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity, man! Let me go out there and let me get one wave, just one wave before you take me in. I mean, come on man, where I am I gonna go? Cliffs on both sides! I’m not gonna paddle my way to New Zealand!”

He goes. He doesn’t come back. But he had the ride of his life.

So the poem the Old Guys posted couldn’t have been more appropriate.

“Do not go gentle into that good night.
Old age should burn and rave at close of day.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”

The poet, who watched his father grow weak and frail with age, is telling us to fight death. No matter how we’ve lived our lives, fight it. Do it for the people who are left behind. Do it to give courage and faith to others in the same battle. Do it because you still can.

Jimbo, you will be missed in the lineup. But you will never be forgotten.

Rest in peace.

"Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night"cancerdeathDylan ThomasHawaiiJim "Jimbo" HudsonOld Guys
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6 Comments

  • Reply gigi-hawaii October 9, 2012 at 4:30 am

    Beautiful tribute to your friend. But I think Heaven is lovely too. Have you read any books about near death experiences?

  • Reply edw October 9, 2012 at 8:43 am

    Glowing tribute his suffering is finally over and he is at peace where he can ride his favorite wave forever.

  • Reply Byggdaddyjayz October 9, 2012 at 9:43 am

    I love this poem. I had it for an assignment as freshman in high school in ’85. Along with our interpretation of what the artist is trying to convey, we had to read it out loud in front of our class. i found it to to be an unforgettable experience.
    it appears that you friend has lived up to the words of Thomas. we all hope to do such. Carpe’ Diem, or in some cases YOLO. Continued blessing up on his family and friends.

  • Reply matt October 9, 2012 at 10:25 am

    condolences on the passing of your friend. I’ve always thought that, when a loved one dies he or she isn’t lost, but, instead, lives on in the lessons they’ve taught you and the stories you remember.

    and shame on you, a writer type, who doesn’t know Dylan Thomas=). even science geeks (me, at least) knows his works.

  • Reply David Jackson October 9, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    Sorry for everyone’s loss. Better waves in heaven I hear.

  • Reply rayboyjr October 9, 2012 at 2:35 pm

    Hey Cat … sorry to hear about your friend …

    … I absolutelly love the idea of fighting til the end … after all, why should death have absolute power over us that we would go so willingly …

    … our time here in life is limited … why not fight for every moment? …

    … the afterlife is eternal … I’m sure God can wait for me … that is, I hope he’s wating for me …

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About Me

About Me
Born and raised on O‘ahu, Hawaiʻi, Catherine Toth Fox has been chronicling her adventures in her blog, The Cat Dish, for more than a decade. She worked as a newspaper reporter in Hawai‘i for 10 years and continues to freelance—in between teaching journalism, hitting the surf and eating everything in sight—for national and local print and online publications. She’s currently the editor of HAWAIʻI Magazine.

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