Maybe it’s because a couple of friends have passed recently, but I’ve been thinking a lot about friendship lately.
I started to look around and take inventory of who’s in my life — and who wasn’t anymore.
While social media — namely, Facebook — has helped me stay connected to friends from childhood, college and old workplaces, it hasn’t really helped me stay connected in a literal sense.
Sure, I know who’s had babies and who’s recently gotten married. But I can’t say I’ve had a long conversation — preferably over food! — with most of my old friends.
Sometimes it’s the distance, sometimes it’s because of schedules. But most often, it comes down to time.
No one seems to have it.
I wonder how much time we spend doing things other than connect with the people we love. How much time do I spend watching reruns of “The Real Housewives” reunions or replying to tweets?
I try to grab lunch or drinks or surf with people — and believe it or not, I’m rarely on my phone during these in-person meetings! — but I can’t meet up with everyone. And that’s sad. So many of my friends — from college, from The Advertiser, from past jobs, from writing groups — I haven’t stayed in touch with. And I miss that.
I’m sure it’s a function of getting older, too. We accumulate friends over the years, and it’s virtually impossible to stay connected to everyone. We pick and choose our close friends, often based on convenience or schedules, and the others tend to fall away.
I hate that.
I saw how devastated the Old Guys were when we lost Jimbo and Donald in the same month. I hate to get the phone call one day that an old friend of mine had passed — and I didn’t have a chance to say anything, namely, “Thanks for being a friend.”
So here’s what I want you all to do: make a date with an old friend. Connect. Reconnect. Say hello. Give that person a big hug. Tell them how much they’ve meant to you. Do it. And do it now. Tomorrow is never a guarantee.
Played golf with old friends last week , look forward to this tourney every year. Great time!
Nice post. Even if you don’t keep in touch, do you ever notice that your true blue friends are people whom you consistently feel close to, no matter how different your chosen paths (that keep you apart) may be?
This is very true. But I do think it’s hard to stay in touch with everyone… And I wish I had kept in better touch with a few… Oh, well, I guess I have my New Year’s resolution for next year!
What a coincidence you chose this topic. In the past month, reconnected with KS ’60 classmates for our 70th B.Day, which is always great to relive our younger lives, especially the “kolohe” boarding years. We welcomed one person, seeing him for first time in 52 years. Went to Maui for grandniece 1st B. Day luau where we spent time with our Maui cousins, newly married sister living in Oregon, and other island siblings. Also spent a day to celebrate a most enjoyable 96th B.Day for my mothers sister, which again had more cousins and friends there. Each of these ended with a prayer that our lives be safe, healthy and mindful of our relationships. Kisses and hugs to end…
Sorry about rambling, but ending with, “Thanks for being a friend” Cat
We love you, too, Chuck!
Nicely put. So I’m thinking I need to fly to HNL and hug an entire congregation of old friends.
I think that’s a GREAT idea!
I carry with me a paper copy of an Ann Landers column from a late-December/early-January long ago. It’s a list of things to do to begin and continue a new year, or really any new day, in a positive spirit and making a constructive difference in the world or just in the life of another person.
Of this list of 30 or 40 things, the very first one listed is: “Call up a forgotten friend.” The very last is:
“Don’t be afraid to say ‘I love you.’ Say it again. They are the sweetest words in the world. If you have love in your life, it can be the best year ever.”
This is very true. Telling people how much they mean to you is something we should all take to heart.
So true. Husband mentioned he delivered paper and went to school with Donald when he saw his obituary and I think it hit him as they were the same age … how life is so short.
Life truly is too short.
What a great post!! I don’t live in Hawaii and when I go home for a visit it is so hard to see all of my friends. But they are all such great friends that they understand that I spend most of my time with my family…
“I have a very hard case and you were my last hope… I had wasted loads of money with other spell casters but never had results… I decided to use your most powerful spell and it is the best investment I have ever made. Your powers are real and you can consider me as a friend for life, thanks to [email protected].