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Yes, I’m still a Toth

By Catherine Toth Fox • July 6, 2012 • Musings, The Daily Dish

It’s the first question most people have asked me since I tied the knot:

“What’s your last name now?”

Truth be told, I had no plans of changing my last name. And it’s not because of an identity issue or because I prefer my last name to my husband’s. (In fact, I actually dig the name Taira.)

I didn’t change my last name because I’m lazy.

Until you’re married, you don’t realize how humbug changing your last name can be. You have to change it on everything, from your Social Security card to your voter registration.

It’s not easy — and I didn’t feel like tracking down every bank account, every magazine subscription, every doctor’s office that needed my new name.

To put this into perspective, here are some of the things that need notification, some of which can take up to six weeks to process:

• Social Security card
• Driver’s license
• All bank accounts
• Documents at your job, including payroll
• Credit card companies
• Insurance companies (auto, home, life)
• Utility companies (such as electric, cable, Internet)
• Schools and alumni associations
• Doctors’ offices
• Post office box
• Voter registration office
• Investment account providers
• Attorney and accountants
• Passport office
• Email and social media accounts

The list goes on and on and on.

Sure, you don’t have to update everyone with your new last name. I mean, your hairstylist and massage therapist don’t need it. But you’d be surprised how tedious the process is to notify all the important ones — banks, credit cards companies, Social Security Administration — about the change.

Honestly, I’d rather spend my time surfing and walking my dogs than chasing after this. It’s all about perspective!

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About the Author

Catherine Toth Fox

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10 Comments

  • Reply Jeri July 6, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    Hey Cat! I totally feel you on that. I purchased a groupon for MissnowMrs.com and it’s supposed to make it all a little easier by providing all the forms you’ll need to fill out and tells you what you need to provide. I will let you know if that service is worth it and if I would recommend anyone to use it in the future.

  • Reply Honey's mom :) July 6, 2012 at 9:57 pm

    Sounds good to me 🙂 I’m not changing my name because there are no more Shobu’s!!! Gotta keep the family name 🙂

  • Reply RobynTee July 6, 2012 at 10:00 pm

    haha… yeah, I couldn’t wait to change my last name to. It was a hassle but worth it for me. Cause now I’m a Taira (funny coincidence).

    Robyn

  • Reply M July 6, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    Hello Cat!
    And I thought you didn’t change your last name because you are a celebrity in the media. 🙂

  • Reply JulieD July 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

    I agree with you, it’s a total pain! I still have stuff in my maiden name and we have been married 9 years! 🙂 Congrats on getting married. Love following you on instagram!! xoxo

  • Reply turkfontaine July 7, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    all good points, and more of them than i ever thought. my wife kept her name also. it was kind of an 80s thing, but she had a small single proprietor architectural business under her name and wanted to keep that front and center. Inez says name changing is a holdover from the days when society looked at a man’s wife as his property ( “like cattle”.. well, she is from Texas)

  • Reply kat July 7, 2012 at 8:00 pm

    good call! I totally waited a year before I did all the changing.

  • Reply Annoddah Dave July 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    CAT: At least you wouldn’t have to change any monogram stuff whether you took his name or kept yours.

  • Reply Annie July 8, 2012 at 10:17 pm

    Been married 9 years and haven’t changed mine either. I almost did, but always found excuses not to. I even created an email account with my husbands last name, LOL! I’m happy I didn’t. Both my children have my husband’s last name and if someone calls me Mrs.____(husband last name)____, I won’t be offended. There are a few things that are troublesome though. I sometimes get personal checks from relatives made out to what they think my name should be even when I”ve told them that I did not change my name. Or people call my husband “Mr. (insert my last name” – It’s hilarious.

  • Reply WildeOscar July 11, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    I didn’t change mine either. Man or woman can change their names at marriage or divorce, no additional charge.

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About Me

About Me
Born and raised on O‘ahu, Hawaiʻi, Catherine Toth Fox has been chronicling her adventures in her blog, The Cat Dish, for more than a decade. She worked as a newspaper reporter in Hawai‘i for 10 years and continues to freelance—in between teaching journalism, hitting the surf and eating everything in sight—for national and local print and online publications. She’s currently the editor of HAWAIʻI Magazine.

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